With the summer of 2004 now a memory and a chill in the air one can not help but notice a kaleidoscope of colors of Autumn. What has been all green is now vivid autumn hues. Red, yellow, orange and mixtures of all three are colors we see from our cars, our offices and from our homes. It is always beautiful, but never actually repeats the season before or the season to follow. As the autumn season draws to it’s end, the winter promises other colors: browns from naked trees, shades of grey from cloudy skies and if luck has it , virgin white only to be seen from a brand new snowfall. While our visual environment has been plentiful, there is one color strikingly missing from our palate. That is often referred to as the holiday blues.

Along with joy, cheer, parties and family gatherings, there is loneliness, reflection on past failures and anxiety about an uncertain future. It is a time when it is easy to fall hostage to these feelings and retreat into a cocoon. To understand the dynamics of holiday blues and to be acquainted with some resources and coping skills can make this time more pleasurable and decrease the associated feelings of stress and depression.

Some causes of the holiday blues:

• Stress
• Fatigue
• Unrealistic Expectations
• Financial constraints
• Over-commercialization
• Geographic limitations to being with family and friends
• Demands due to holiday guests
• Insufficient time to complete shopping due to work demands
• Anticipation and post holiday let down

Along with a depressed mood during this time other stress responses may develop, such as excessive drinking, over-eating and difficulty sleeping.

The following are some methods of coping with stress and depression during the holidays:

Set realistic goals. Prioritize what is most important, keep a list, and organize your time. Always be aware of your inbox ( what you can and cannot do). When the box gets full, say “no” and take care of your self.

Keep in mind that the holiday season doesn’t negate feelings of sadness or loneliness. Give yourself permission for those feelings to be present, even if you choose to keep them private. A rule of thumb is that it is always better to express feelings instead of suppressing them.

Try to avoid comparing this season with the last. Reminiscing has its pros and cons. Use it to your advantage and adopt a future outlook.

Think about others. Volunteering for those less fortunate can be a rewarding experience and take the focus of “poor me”.

Look for activities that are “free”. Things like window shopping, driving through decorated neighborhoods, or if weather complies, building a snowman with family or friends.

Spend time with supportive people. Reach out and contact old friends and family. Try to get together with a new friend.

Try something new. Find a new recipe, invite a new friend to the celebration, find creative ways to decorate the house or tree. Change one thing from the previous year.

Make time for yourself. Exercise, pamper yourself, read a book, sip spiced cider, call a friend far away. Whatever it is just do it for you. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Let others share some of the responsibilities of the holiday activities.

Use affirmations daily.

The above list is not inclusive but suggests some real ways to limit the holiday blues. And if all fails reach out for help. Talking to a mental health professional can alleviate some of the symptoms and prevent a more serious condition from occurring.

Barbara Peters
Licensed Professional Counselor, RN
www.bjpcounseling.com